The List - #101 completed

101. Organize all the books in the library.

On the surface, this seemed like a pretty easy one. But like most items on The List, it was tougher than it appeared. There were a couple of factors that contributed to this: that we had book in several locations, and that Beth and I are both particular (and stubborn) about even little things, like where to put our books.

I started the job and the master plan was to have fiction on one side, non fiction on the other, and a big row of cookbooks in the middle. That is basically what we went with, aside from a small section of Southern Writing, both fiction and non fiction, together. I started strong but ran out of steam and patience partway through the job. Beth picked up the slack from there, doing a lot of the hard core sorting midway through. Then I came on strong at the end to finish up. We're happy with how it looks. So, that's about 2% of our house that is now neat and organized. 98% to go!

Last Comic Standing - June 28 recap

NBC’s Last Comic Standing tempted us with surprisingly palatable audition rounds, building expectations for this show higher than they have been in years. But as we have seen here too often before, many comics can be funny once for a couple of minutes before growing tiresome and letting us down. In fact, that very pattern hasn’t been enough to prevent someone from winning this competition. Say, in the first season, for example. The semi finals have arrived, where we get more of everything: new material, longer sets, and a better chance to judge how funny the contestants really are.

Host Craig Robinson kicked things off at the historic Alex Theater in Hollywood, seated in a plush leather chair on stage, bathed in ominous light. He looked and sounded like a vintage Bond villain as he asked, “Who will survive? Who has what it takes to make it? Why am I holding this cat?” He informed us that the top 20 audition performers had advanced to this point, and that “only the funniest” will move on from here. He didn’t quote an exact number, but something around 10 is a safe bet.

First up was Myq Kaplan, he of the interesting name spelling and highbrow material. He explained that his audition last season did not go well, leaving him as “one of the first comics not standing.” Things should be different for him this time. He kept his stuff smart, beginning with a great run on books and how authors fool people that don’t read by re-releasing their work with a different cover when it is made into a movie. He also joked about religious fiction, “Like The DaVinci Code, or The Bible…sure, The DaVinci Code might be real.” From here he smoothly transitioned into funny bits about people that believe Satan exists, but that he isn’t gay. “He’s horny and flaming, close enough,” said Myq. This year the three judges critique each comic after their set, exactly like on American Idol, except without any incoherent ramblings or anyone getting told they were “a little pitchy.” The panel loved Myq’s set, with Natasha noting that his “subdued, kind of intellectual” presence was not hampered at all by the bigger auditorium. He did very well.

Next was Jamie Lee, both excited and nervous. “I am quite terrified to know that millions of people are watching,” she stated. But she showed no problem with nerves on stage, delivering a solid set that began with good stuff about her rocky relationship history. “I used to date a comedian,” she explained. “And I guess I knew the relationship was falling apart when even our inside jokes were bombing.” Andy Kindler summed things up perfectly, saying, “I love your style and…not all of it hit with me, but when it hit it was really, really great.” Natasha Leggero was also positive without gushing. “I think you have huge potential,” she said.

Mike DeStefano made quite an impression during the audition round with his Bronx bravado, so it was no surprise that the attitude carried over here. In fact, he ramped up the intensity even further. “I’m not interested in making friends with anybody. I’m here to win and be a better comic than all of them.” I love the confidence, and yet I’m shocked that he, of all people, was the first one to spout off a classic reality show cliché. But unlike most idiots that have uttered something like that before, coming from him it just sounded genuine. That’s really who he is. Give us more, Mike. “I want to make it so that I’m so good that if I don’t win that the audience will just light the theater on fire.” That’s what I’m talking about! He brought the same feel to the stage, talking about his upbringing, when everyone acted Italian, including a Chinese friend named Carmine. He talked a lot about his family. “My father was a gambler,” he said. “We were rich seven times.” The crowd and the panel really enjoyed it. “Great material, great point of view,” said Greg Giraldo succinctly.

Kyle Grooms is one of the more seasoned performers in the field, yet he admitted that tonight’s show would have his biggest audience ever. He was very comfortable on stage, with jokes about how derisive people are about his home state of New Jersey, claiming that it is “up there with Iraq.” However, apparently the situation is even worse elsewhere. “Detroit’s doing so bad that Haiti’s throwing them a benefit concert.” He didn’t hit anything out of the park, but was very solid. “Do people really hate Jersey that much,” asked Natasha, “Or is it just Snooki?” Greg continued piling onto the Garden state. “I think Jersey sucks too, I agree with you 100%,” he joked.

Shane Mauss was the night’s first polarizing performer. “It’s the only thing I’ve ever been good at in my life,” he said of stand up comedy. “I have to make this work.” Well, kudos to him, then, for not compromising at all, jumping right into a very dark run about waiting a long time in line for an amusement park ride and then hearing that later a woman on the same ride lost both her legs on it in an accident. The audience seemed like they weren’t with him at the start, but he won them over by the end of his set, including a great closing line about the woman in question and how she will no longer ride roller coasters…because she doesn’t meet the height requirement. “The crowd obviously loves dismemberment humor,” noted Andy mockingly. “As we all do.” Natasha clearly understood where Shane was coming from as well, stating “I like someone who’s comfortable with a good groaning audience.”

Adrienne Iapalucci was thrilled that advancing this far meant she might have a shot at ditching her day job for good. “Sorry to the guys in the office,” she explained. “I love you, but not enough to hang out with you 40 hours a week.” Judging from her set, she doesn’t spend much time hanging out with her mother, either, despite living in her basement. She transitioned from that confrontational relationship to her trying job as a nanny. She stated that the kids she watched were so awful that, while she would never hit them herself, she “could kind of…coerce one into hitting the other.” Her mostly deadpan delivery was well received by the panel. She was unique and enjoyable.

Next was the imposing presence of Felipe Esparza, with his shaggy hair, scruffy beard, and nouveau-homeless chic stage apparel. The crowd loved him immediately, before he even finished his bit about the unsavory characters present on mass transit. “The back of the bus looks like the bar in Star Wars,” he noted. “I think there is a variance in the material,” observed Andy, before saying that overall he thought it was funny. “You’re one of these guys that’s able to talk about your real life,” said Greg. “And make it very funny.” This was a wise observation, because that certainly seemed to be the basis for all of Felipe’s material thus far.

Jonathan Thymius made no apologies for his motivation to this point. “Making it to the semi finals is huge for me because I want to be famous.” If he continues doing it like he did this week, he’s got a very good shot at it. He had one of the night’s best jokes: “So my wife called me a scatterbrain…I said, listen, whatever your name is, I want to find the car as bad as you do.” Quoting it here just doesn’t do it justice, because so much of the humor comes from his unique presence and brilliant delivery. He was so good that the crowd was already laughing during the set ups of his jokes. He ended by jokingly asking the crowd if they wanted to see a ventriloquist act. When they responded enthusiastically, he slowly removed one shoe and put his own sock on his hand…before holding the microphone up to his bare foot. Again, explaining this joke just makes it sound weird. It killed. “I love your delivery,” gushed Andy. “I don’t care if you’re insane.” Greg agreed. “You’re an absolute original,” he said.

“I really want to bring everybody into my comedic world,” proclaimed Lil’ Rel. I think he did that, but the problem was that it was just loud, long, and not funny. He performed one single, extended bit about a man’s desire to read his mother’s obituary aloud at her funeral. This isn’t exactly a comic goldmine of a topic to begin with, but Lil’ Rel’s decision to have the character he played repeat himself over and over made things even worse. The judges had been almost entirely positive to this point, so I wondered if this was just an instance where the material didn’t work for me personally. It was not. “You did one long bit,” said Andy. “It didn’t so much connect with me.” Natasha jumped right in and piled on, adding “Not only was it just one bit, but for even the first laugh, it seemed like it took a really long time to get there.” Lil’ Rel defended himself by explaining that he was performing character comedy. He then compared himself to Eddie Murphy and Richard Pryor, and was struck by a bolt of lightning. Okay, maybe not the last bit, but…wow. That may have been what he was going for, but he clearly didn’t get there.

Jason Weems was another performer relishing the opportunity he had been given. “Tonight can be the defining moment that gets me…from performing for 18 people to hopefully 18,000.” He was clearly excited to be there, and that positivity carried over to his very first joke. “I have always wanted to point into a balcony,” he noted, doing just that to the fans upstairs. “I have made it.” From there he went on to talk about his day job as a kindergarten teacher, including one little girl who watched him intently as he ate a banana. “Ahh…he is a monkey,” the girl said, with Jason quoting her in a very funny, near-whispered revelatory voice. He talked about trying not to take offense, before realizing, “All that lets me know is you had a previous discussion on the possibilities of me being a monkey.” I found this bit hilarious, but Natasha said she had a hard time connecting. Apparently the audience agreed with me, because they voraciously booed her upon hearing that statement. “I thought you had some jokes that were really good,” said Greg, “and some that weren’t as good.”

Ryan Hamilton feigned confidence by noting that he could always return to his non-competitive valet parking job if comedy didn’t work out. But he won the audience over immediately with his self-deprecating remark that “I know you can tell just by looking at me that I’m a big risk taker.” Everything about him made this funny, from his gangly build to his, umm, “interesting” face to his voice that quavers on the verge of cracking. He then rolled through a funny, extended bit about his sky diving experience on a jump with an instructor who insisted on being called Tandem Master. “You’re already strapped to my back,” said Ryan. “I know who’s boss in this situation.” He had several other really funny jokes about the experience, but once again Natasha did not feel a connection…and again, the audience booed her. I thought she was supposed to be the Paula of the panel, not the Simon. Natasha did give him credit for his physicality, and Greg observed how Ryan got laughs merely by walking on stage. “In real life, that’s not good,” Greg quipped.

Paula Bel was a brusque, no-nonsense lady during her audition and that demeanor carried forward to her mindset for the semis. “I’m going to do what I like to do,” she stated. Her set featured jokes about how President Obama’s time in office is aging him so much that eventually he’ll look like Grady from Sanford and Son. She had some other bits that seemed to connect with the audience, but I noticed a small but distracting tic, in which she often seemed to stumble or pause slightly right before delivering a key word in a punch line. The judges didn’t comment on it, so maybe that was just me. But then again, the panel didn’t have much of a chance to say anything, as Paula shot down each of them with biting, funny comments.

Jesse Joyce looks forward to getting to celebrate his success in the “comedy locker rooms,” which is probably a place not many of us would ever want to go. He began with a funny bit about having played a comedian in a movie, and how movies never depict the profession accurately, comparing it to how a pizza delivery guy must feel watching a porno flick. Joyce then ventured into a joke with a very long set up about breaking down while driving in a tunnel, and then having to exit on an access road and return to the beginning of his trek. These semi final sets are short, and yet the set up to this one was so long that he actually asked the audience “Are you with me so far?” The payoff was strong, though, with him realizing that he was now sitting in a traffic jam that he had created himself. Natasha noted that his material would have benefitted from a longer set, and that was certainly the case. Greg seemed impressed with the attempt to do something different, rather than the rapid-fire jokes we had seen so much before.

Rachel Feinstein was another comic with a different approach. “I tell stories, I don’t so much do joke-punch line,” she explained. She had funny stuff about dating a guy with a unique physique, including his “pronounced hips.” She performed a couple of distinctive characters, showing talent for voices, which Natasha found fun to watch. Greg noted that some of the male audience members reacted “like filthy pigs,” when Rachel walked on. “It’s very hard to be hot, and get that reaction, and then be funny,” said Greg. “And you were.”

Many of the night’s comics commented on the possibility of exposure, but Kirk Fox let us in on a different kind completely, something he experienced when his pants fell off on stage in Tijuana. “I believe I exposed more there than I will tonight.” His strength is his unique personality and stage presence, and even he admitted that he thought he was funnier between his jokes than during them. However, his bit about knowing how he is going to die because his 100-year-old upstairs neighbor recently bought a .357 Magnum was very solid. “I love your energy on stage,” said Andy. “I love your approach.”

Amanda Melson wasn’t sure if she was most excited about the show serving as a chance for more money, better exposure, or just as an opportunity to prove something to herself. She led off with a very funny bit about her recent haircut, because her prior style had gotten “long to the point where I looked like I might have been home schooled.” She then transitioned into talking about working for a cool company that felt the need to be edgy in everything they did, including their clothing drive for the homeless. Greg summed things up nicely, observing that “Maybe it wasn’t the hugest reaction but I thought the jokes were really well written.”

Chip Pope finally gave us a completely new reason for enjoying being on the show: because it means he might not die in the same apartment he’s been living in for the past ten years. Chip explained that he is gay, but that his family lived in an efficiency growing up, so he couldn’t even come out of the closet. “I had to come out from behind the curtain that separated the living room from the kitchen.” He also had a very smart bit about imagining what Paul Simon’s latest song would sound like. It’s hard to explain exactly how Chip did this, but it worked very well, mimicking Simon’s vocal tone and songwriting style. “I’d never heard anything like it,” raved Greg.

Let’s take a moment to acknowledge new host Craig Robinson, who has been doing a great job holding everything together so far, with a quick quip here and a funny aside to the judges there. However, he might be at his best when he’s talking right to us. “You’re watching the show that I know I could win if it weren’t for these damn bunions,” he said. “Oh, wait, that’s Dancing With The Stars. That show sucks!” I just find him really likeable.

Alycia Cooper showed no ill effects from such a long wait to go on. “I’m just ready to do it,” she proclaimed. She opened with a riff on the current invasive state of airport security before making a simple request of guys everywhere. “Men, please stop cheating,” she implored. “You suck at it.” She followed this with jokes about Tiger Woods and his 18 “side pieces,” and their less than stellar quality, telling guys that if they’re going to cheat, at least “cheat up.” Greg was right in stating that some of the jokes were very funny, while others didn’t rise up.

David Feldman wrapped up the night with a wry observation about how he was thrilled to be a part of the 2500 people that reached the semis and really hoped to advance to the next round of 1500. Tonight’s performances were mostly very solid, but his numbers didn’t feel far off at this point, so I was just happy to see him do something different. David has a velvety smooth vocal tone, like a radio announcer or voiceover artist, which made his dark jokes about his daughters sound even more cutting. Greg loved the twists and surprises in David’s joke writing, noting that with that kind of stuff, the audience doesn’t even matter. “The crowd gets in the way,” David deadpanned. He was distinctive and memorable, if not an outright laugh riot.

That brought us to the end of the first semi final performance round. And while this show takes blatant shots at American Idol, they did everything aside from bringing in Ryan Seacrest to say, “dim the lights,” for the manner in which they announced the five comics moving on. Everyone was brought to the stage as a group, and this is where I first noticed something a little off. At the start of the show, it was stated that 20 comics were performing, but there were definitely more than that on stage. Around 23, I think. Now, I’m not going to rewind and freeze-frame this thing like it’s the Zapruder film, but I did find it odd. Maybe there were some performances that were actually a part of next week’s show, which would make complete sense.

Anyway, then Ryan, I mean Craig, divided the comics into five groups, having them step forward as a group one at a time. One comedian from each group advanced to what they now told us was the final ten. After this 3200-plus word monstrosity, I’m not going to list every member of every group for you, but here is who moved on: Felipe, Myq, Rachel, Mike, and Jonathan. There were a couple of cuts that I thought were kind of painful, but I was not surprised in the least to see any of those five move forward.

I’m still a little confused, because the previews showed essentially the same format taking place again next Monday. But my program guide lists a one-hour episode coming on Tuesday. I don’t know what to tell you, so I guess we’re in the dark together, waiting to see exactly how the last five spots get filled.

Food advertising pet peeve

I have always hated food items described with weird or needless adjectives, but that is just an attempt to make something more appealing, albeit in an odd and slightly annoying way. But there is a new trend that I just cannot get over: calling food items something that they're not. I'm not talking about "deconstructed" menu items, which seem to be all the rage on any televised cooking competition. That may be a little precious, but it at least makes some sort of sense, just presenting the ingredients in a new way. I'm talking about taking a defined food title that actually means something, and applying it to something else. Here are two examples.

#1. The Arby's "Roastburger." It is not a burger. It is a roast beef sandwich. Now, Arby's selling roast beef sandwiches makes all sorts of sense. Arby's selling a burger would also be fine. But Arby's selling a roast beef sandwich and calling it a burger is asinine. It is a sandwich comprised of slices of roast beef topped with things that often go on a burger. This is akin to selling a roast beef sandwich, splashing some salsa on it, and calling it a Roast Taco. No. Just stop.

#2. The Burger King Brunch "Mimosa." A mimosa is a delicious beverage mixing some sort of sparkling white wine, usually champagne, with orange juice. BK mixes OJ and Sprite. So, this is not unlike me mixing Hershey's syrup with seltzer and calling it a scotch and soda. Of course, if I did that, people would think that I was psychotic. Which this is.

The older I get, the more shit like this annoys me.

Last Comic Standing - June 21 recap

After three hours of audition episodes, NBC’s Last Comic Standing surprised many viewers by being genuinely funny. Could we actually expect more quality comedy from another audition round in New York City? Would Andy Kindler continue his great sartorial suggestions? And how does Greg Giraldo keep his scruff exactly that length all the time? Most of these questions were answered this week.

Host Craig Robinson caught viewers up with a quick “previously on” recap, explaining how the show is conducting “a massive search for stand up genius.” That might be stretching things a little, but after recent seasons we will be ecstatic to get a handful of comics that don’t make us want to claw our own eyes out. This was the final audition episode and it’s simply amazing that the show has found a plethora of worthy candidates, when in recent seasons they couldn’t find even one. This episode unfolded just like last week’s, with a series of tryouts at New York City’s Gotham Comedy Club.

Once again, we saw several solid comics right off the bat, including a few semi-recognizable faces. Kyle Grooms has been on TV a fair amount before, including on several VH1 pop culture specials. He’s a funny guy, and he advanced to callbacks on the strength of his routine about our current “beige” president. Another quality performer that advanced to the showcase was Nikki Glaser, who I just saw in an interesting documentary called I Am Comic, which is about, ironically enough, stand up comedy. She made it to the semis of LCS four years ago and admitted that she wasn’t ready then. She is now, with a confident, polished act. “I think we saw a lot of interesting individuals in New York,” said judge Natasha Legerro. “And the ones that were funny were really funny.”

Sadly, we were still force-fed the obligatory montage of the ones that weren’t funny, including but not limited to clowns, jugglers, and cross-dressers. Andy Kindler seemed to have tired of evaluating the sideshow freaks. “I relate to vulnerability,” he said. “I like a comic who sweats inappropriately.” Another thing that seemed to grate on him was a string of anti-Semitic material. Granted, most of it was done by comics that were Jewish themselves, but that didn’t make him any less sick of it. We saw him react to one Jewish joke after another before he pleaded for mercy from his fellow judges. “If one of the comics tries to round me up, will someone intervene?”

Meanwhile, Craig attended to the patient masses outside again, which this week included a telemarketer, a chef, and a post-op tranny. The talent was diverse on stage as well, where we saw auditions from a vegan, a husband and wife (performing separately), and the 19-year-old brother of comedy legend Chris Rock. Young Jordan Rock wasn’t quite ready for the spotlight, and the judges noted that his material just wasn’t up to par yet. But he was undaunted, promising to return as a funnier, more prepared 20-year-old next season. “The audition process is very difficult,” noted Andy. “I admire anyone that does it well.”

One “comic” who did not audition well was the unfortunate person inside something that resembled a Twinkie mascot costume. This turned out to be a painful advertisement for an upcoming film from NBC’s parent company, Universal. These kinds of product placement sellout stunts are more prevalent than ever now, and they range in tastefulness from mildly obtrusive to entirely offensive. This one fell somewhere in the middle, partially because the judges at least made fun of the whole thing. “Oh wait, this is the product integration audition,” Greg Giraldo noted. NBC’s not paying me, so I don’t need to repeat the copywriting that Natasha plowed through with a big, fake smile on her face like a good solider. Instead, I’ll echo Greg’s sentiments toward his fellow panelists: “Nice work, whores.”

The second New York showcase saw 11 more worthy comics move on to the semi finals. The aforementioned Nikki Glaser got a ticket, as did Kyle Grooms with a very funny and self-deprecating bit about his unintimidating name. “Kyle is a nice name,” he noted, “But it’s not a Mandingo black man’s name.” Carmen Lynch advanced, and judging by my highly unscientific Twitter research of trending topics and retweets, she had one of the most popular sets of the night, referencing her therapist throwing her off by using an odd phrase about being unable to put an egg back into a chicken. “That is the most distracting analogy I’ve ever heard,” she explained. “That’s all I want to do now…I’m going to find a chicken and I’m going to shove an egg into its chicken hole.”

Ryan Hamilton advanced on the strength of a bit that mocked New Yorkers and their perception that anyone between the coasts is located in the Midwest, noting “Everything past Jersey is corn cob pipes and coveralls in your head.” Jerry Rocha was thrilled at receiving a ticket, saying, “This is the only thing I’ve ever won in my life.” Mike Vecchione, Jason Weems, Nick Cobb, and Adrienne Iapalucci all moved on as well, as did the uniquely named Myq Kaplan, who had a strong set about his previous gigs at engineering schools, as well as a very popular bit about his desire to rename the nickname for a certain part of a woman’s anatomy. The final spot went to Brian McKim of the married contestants. His wife seemed genuinely more happy for him than upset for herself, which was nice to see.

And that is where we stand. Craig summed up New York nicely, saying, “We’ve seen a lot of great comics and a lot of things I never want to talk about again.” Auditions are done, and we move directly on to the semi final round next week. Based on the comedians we know have moved on, things look like they are right on track. This isn’t a murderer’s row of comic legends, but rather a group of unique comedians with strong points of view, most of whom seem to be legitimately funny so far. NBC producers could certainly pull some strings and assemble a lineup of finalists exactly the way they want it, but unlike seasons past, right now there doesn’t appear to be a lot of possibility for egregious choices to be made. We have a very solid group of talented comics, and the semi final round should continue to be humorous and entertaining. To this point, the show has been pleasantly devoid of the worst drama that tainted it before. Let’s hope it stays that way.

Last Comic Standing - June 14 recap

Last week, NBC surprised viewers by bringing Last Comic Standing back to their summer schedule. In an even bigger shock, the retooled show was genuinely funny. Was this a one-week wonder, or are we in for a funny season for the first time in years?

Host Craig Robinson was back with his keytar in tow, starting things off with another little song to get things going. We also got to see Andy Kindler and Greg Giraldo gently swaying to the beat, while Natasha Leggero exhibited some serious dance moves. It’s also worth mentioning that she looks like she might be about four foot six. The scene had moved to a round of auditions at the Gotham Comedy Club in New York City, a hotbed for the American stand up comedy scene.

Right from the jump, Greg continued to demonstrate impressive chops as a judge as he informed the first comic about the manner in which a bad tag ruined a good joke. Shortly after this, the producers and editors elected to get the obligatory “New York/mafia/gangsters” stuff out of the way by showing one comedian outside a pizza parlor with his buddies, a motley crew that looked like they walked right off the set of a Scorsese movie. We were even subjected to a knockoff of Godfather soundtrack music over the bit. The comedian in question, Mike DeStefano, exhibits an intentionally brusque manner and he seems like an interesting guy, explaining that he used to be a drug counselor and, before that, a drug addict.

The auditions continued, and for the second straight week the talent level was high. There were some great jokes from people that didn’t even get callbacks to the showcase, like Kevin Bozeman’s stance on abortion, when he noted “I’m pro life except for like two times.” Judge Andy was conflicted on this week’s talent pool. “I was actually very happy with how many good comics there are,” he stated. “And then I thought the level of comedy sunk really low.” He might have been referring to the next performer, who took to the stage naked. The judges gunned him down mercilessly and deservedly. “This can be pixilated,” the comic stated, referring to his own junk. “No need,” replied Greg immediately. “It already looks pixilated,” added Andy. Natasha just tried to look away, but like an eclipse, she seemed unable to avert her eyes. At home we thankfully didn’t see anything but a black bar obscuring the area. It sounds like we missed something fascinating, though. “His groin looked like a hairy, brown version of a game show buzzer,” explained Andy in far too graphic detail.

Craig took to the streets to encourage the waiting contestants, asking some what they planned to do once they got inside. “I’m gonna do a whole bunch of foolishness,” blurted out one hopeful. Cut to the vintage LCS parade of weirdness. “Some of the people that come in are just crazy people,” noted Greg. “And for this competition, you need to be funny on purpose.” This observance could have been specifically targeted at a comic who entered in head to toe clown apparel and announced, “I might be the last comic standing, you never know.” The judges were not impressed. “No, we know,” answered Greg.

However, the good heavily outweighed the bad for the second straight week. That’s why I found it odd that the editing elected to dip back into the cliché well again. “When you come to New York you expect to see a certain amount of that typical New York style comedy,” noted Natasha. And judging from the montage that followed, “typical” meant “Italian.” It was a series of quick cuts featuring only Italian last names or big, bad accents. “Guess what, guys? You need more than just the accent,” she added. This bit just felt odd, coming on the heels of the prior DeStefano piece that was staged exactly like a scene from The Sopranos. It just seemed like overkill.

Something else beaten to the brink of death was, surprisingly, a ton of ventriloquists and their dummies. There were a staggering number of them, including one whose dummy had his own dummy. “The third guy was cool,” said Greg of the trio. “But for what I’m looking for, I’d say no.” Andy also had to offer a resounding negative to the ventriloquist who made no attempt to actually throw his voice, but instead just covered his mouth with his hand and a cigar. Thankfully, this minor interjection of badness was followed by another string of callbacks to several funny people.

At the showcase that evening, nine lucky comics won tickets to perform in the semi final round in Hollywood. Roy Wood Jr. was funny on stage and all business off it, noting that he immediately wanted to dig into his notebook after learning he had advanced. Tommy Johnagin was my favorite performer of the night, with some really funny stuff about his breakup after a long-term relationship. His delivery was great, even if his voice sounded almost exactly like Shia LaBeouf. Claudia Cogan demonstrated an extreme desire to move on, saying that she would do whatever it took, including turning into ten tigers on stage. I hope to see that next week, because she got a red ticket. Kurt Metzger was an interesting guy who seems like he’d be fun to watch in the house. Speaking of which, are we getting the house this year? Did NBC keep the lease on the Scooby Doo mansion? I honestly have no idea.

The final two of the night’s nine slots went to Mike DeStefano and Jamie Lee, a funny young woman who couldn’t contain her genuine enthusiasm at getting a callback, running through the aisles of the Gotham Comedy Club, wielding her ticket like a lottery winner. Good for her. Earlier she let us know that she had quit her day gig and put all her eggs in the comedy basket. Stories like hers are what this show should be all about.

After two weeks I’m beyond happy with the potential pool of finalists, and judging from the comics we’ve seen so far, there is little potential for casting drama. The semi finalists are so good that the producers couldn’t screw this up even if they wanted to—a claim that has actually been leveled in the past. Next week we get another round of auditions in the Big Apple, giving us even more talented comedians to contend for the final spots. Compared to the last few seasons, this has been an embarrassment of riches so far.

Last Comic Standing - June 7 recap

In the world of third tier summer television programming, anything goes. Case in point: Monday’s season premiere of Last Comic Standing on NBC, a show that has seemingly died more times than Kenny on South Park. They aren’t reinventing the wheel here, but if the first episode is any indication, this season has the potential to be one of the funniest ones the show has ever seen.

The affair kicked off with the introduction of a new host, and a genuinely funny one at that, Craig Robinson of The Office and Hot Tub Time Machine. He addressed the question on everyone’s mind immediately. “Last Comic Standing is back,” he announced. “I bet you’re wondering, how the hell did that happen?” Craig was nattily clad in an ascot and a smoking jacket—not the last one we’d see tonight—as he reminded everyone what the competition is about while plunking out a little tune on his keyboard. The grand prize this season is not just a vague talent deal, but $250,000 of cold, hard cash. Craig’s song ended, revealing an enthusiastic throng of would-be contestants behind him lining the streets outside The Improv in Los Angeles.

Inside, the comics auditioned for an entirely new panel of judges, and again, this season has made a tremendous upgrade by selecting Greg Giraldo, Natasha Leggero, and Andy Kindler, a trio of respected working comedians. Giraldo is a staple of the brilliant recent run of roasts on Comedy Central and his quick wit and experience are an excellent addition to this show. Kindler is another veteran, one who provided both valuable commentary and absurd fashion suggestions. I’m not as familiar with Natasha Leggero, but she was very funny and wildly charismatic. It’s no stretch to say this is the best panel of judges the show has ever seen.

The format of the show remained familiar, with the comics auditioning for the judges in hopes of being called back to another showcase performance. The night’s first performer, Maronzio Vance, set the tone for the evening. He tried out for the second season and admittedly wasn’t ready then. He is now, as he was funny and earned a callback. Lest we think that the nature of the audition shows has changed completely, we were quickly subjected to the vintage LCS parade of sideshow freaks, including a gothic killer clown and a man with an acoustic guitar and a devil costume, who was told succinctly that not only was he not getting a callback, but that he simply shouldn’t leave the house. “There were really some diamonds in the rough,” observed Natasha. “But I have to say, a lot of rough.” Unlike recent seasons, however, there were many more comics that could be seen as diamonds. Some of the bad ones were even good, like Kirk Fox, who pulled the plug on himself after a meandering tangent. “I peaked in the hallway,” he admitted. The judges admired both his sense of humor and his outright surrender. He was invited back for the showcase.

One frequent criticism of the show is that the producers often cast for types, not just for the funniest comedians, and those who think that will not be dissuaded by what they saw on Monday. We saw an at-home feature piece with Laurie Kilmartin, a single mom who has been performing for over two decades. She seems genuinely smart and funny, and she deserved better than some of the stagey bits they showed with her son at home. The show usually provides a handful of comics that I personally find tremendously annoying, yet ones I know will probably advance to the finals of the show. In this premiere episode, there weren’t many that fit the bill, but Fortune Feimster did. She also rated an at-home feature that consisted of nothing more than her dressing up and using silly, grating voices. To me, she was painfully unfunny. But she made the showcase, and I’d bet that she advances farther.

At the auditions, the good continued to mix with the bad. What I enjoyed was that instead of just outright awful, like the Buck Starrs of auditions past, this time we had comically talented judges critiquing overplayed, hackneyed stage styles and techniques. “I know what you’re thinking” was one line that they sagely picked on, followed by a plethora of performers trying to get a laugh with that exact phrase, usually at the expense of their own appearance or ethnic background. This was another point of emphasis for the judges, who observed how often current comics poke fun at themselves with bad jokes about their mixed race origins. Deft editing then revealed a veritable parade of just those kinds of jokes. The momentary lull left Natasha a little dazed. “Now I know why Paula Abdul was constantly high on pills,” she said in one of a handful of deserved potshots at American Idol.

Prescription medication may have helped Natasha weather the storm that was Edith Piaf, a pseudo-ventriloquist dog act. It was unique, for sure, since the dog in question was real, and the voice coming from it belonged to a woman with a microphone in the wings while another “performer” simply sat on stage holding the dog. It was as bizarre as it sounds, yet I laughed out loud at the canine that could have been Triumph’s long-lost cousin, and so did Greg. “I did laugh,” he admitted. “Because I laugh at anything weird or unusual.” Alas, Edith was not asked back.

But as the first day of L.A. auditions drew toward a conclusion, there was reason for optimism. This was an undeniably strong group, one so adept that humorous but imperfect comics like Guy Torry were left to wonder whether they were good enough. He had great stage presence and would have been a true contender in recent seasons, yet the judges observed that his material was not yet on par with his performance. This was a brilliant, dead-on note, and not the kind of wise comment we have seen often before in the early stages of this program. “The caliber of talent in Los Angeles has ranged from super polished headlining comedian to really unique voices who are about ready to break out and that’s what I’m looking for,” stated Natasha.

We were shown glimpses of fifteen comics performing at the showcase, although more than that actually took the stage. There wasn’t too much drama as 11 contestants were picked to advance to the semi-finals, with the lone bit of manufactured tension coming by leaving the single mom’s name to be called last. Unless this was your first time watching a competitive reality show like this, it was clear that she was advancing. The others joining her were a diverse, interesting, and mostly funny group.

Host Craig took to the monsoon-pelted streets of Los Angeles to do it all again for a second full day of auditions. There was plenty of crazy left for day two, including jugglers, balloon artists, and one guy dressed as an alien warrior, with an outfit complete down to a meticulously made up mask. “I think some people think if they put a crazy get-up on that they won’t have to write any material,” said Andy. Cut to: a guy in a furry suit on stilts. “And they are almost always wrong about that.” One flashy bit of styling worth noting belonged to Jonathan Thymius, a dry, older gentleman who took Andy’s joking suggestion to wear a smoking jacket to heart, showing up for his callback in a sparkly gold number that was a complete contrast to his personality. It was a great choice, and the judges loved it.

Showcase number two saw seven more talented performers picked to advance. I loved Rachel Feinstein’s unique perspective, Paula Bel’s sardonic manner, Chip Pope’s enthusiastic and infectious presence, and Jason Nash’s hilarious bit about his three year old son sounding like a World War Two general. After the first round of auditions, it is hard not to get excited about the prospects this season. It’s like watching a very talented draft class of athletes move from the college ranks to the pros, and after recent years so bad that I literally could not handle the show anymore, my spirits are buoyed. We have an amusing and enjoyable host, knowledgeable and hilarious judges, and several contestants that were laugh-out-loud funny. There has only been one audition stop, and we already have a wealth of unique comic voices to root for. Comedy is certainly subjective, but anyone who has watched the show before would be hard pressed to deny that, after this episode, it looks like a former train wreck is solidly and surprisingly back on track. Next week, the auditions move to New York City, and if the talent approaches what we saw in week one, we’re easily looking at the best potential group since the show’s heyday in seasons one through three.

The List - #53 completed

53. Spend one weekend eating only what we have one hand.

I took this one a step farther and did it for a whole week.  Reported with some details on my other blog.

I really need to get back to working on The List.